GRAMMAR RULES GONE BAD

Never use a preposition to end a sentence with.
And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
Avoid clichés like the plague. (They're really old hat.)
Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
Be more or less specific.
Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
Understatement is always the absolute best way
to put forth earth-shaking ideas.
Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
Even IF a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

Author unknown (probably by choice :))

Australia is a long way, away

Yesterday my son left for school in Australia.

“Don't worry about the world coming to an end today.
It is already tomorrow in Australia.”
Charles Schultz

What's Missing

If a child is to keep alive his inborn sense of wonder,
he needs the companionship
of at least one adult who can share it,
rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in.
-- Rachel Carson --

After 29 years of employment in Christian education, the last 17 in some level of administration, I am not at school. Those who know me and once worked with me call this new thing: retirement. I find the word awkward and it seems to stick to my tongue but seems more comforting to those who know me, than actually my explaining the reasons which have lead me away from the classroom.
Equally awkward has been answering the question, “How are you doing?” when the questioner is serious and actually desires an answer. This past week I finally had an answer. "I miss the children." I related this to a close friend yesterday, who lived nearly 30 years in the UK. She paid me the following compliment (I think it was complimentary), “You are the most English of anyone I know in the U.S.” I knew she saw through the veiled meaning. I really do miss the children, though.
I also miss the drive in the early morning over the Whale Harbor Bridge. Seeing the colors of the new day over the expanse of the Atlantic invigorated each and every day with a sense of wonder and God’s mercies. I miss the wonder.
The Rabbi Abraham Joshua Herschel on his death bed declared to his closest friend, “Sam, never once in my life did I ask God for success or wisdom or power, or fame. I asked for wonder, and he gave it to me.”
I am missing the wonder of the adventure of each new day and the eyes of the children.

"The world will never starve for want of wonders,
but for want of wonder."
-- Gilbert K. Chesterton --

You know you are not Reformed if

All in good fun. Why several of my best friends are reformed....

. . . you think the Apostles Creed is the guy who fought Rocky in Rocky I.

. . . you think the Canons of Dort are like the Guns of Navarrone.

. . . you think Ursinus is a nasal condition.

. . . you think Arminians are the people who run convenience stores.

. . . you think the Belgic Confession was from WWII war crimes trials.

. . . you think “popery” in the church makes it smell flowery.

. . . you think the psalter goes with the pepper shaker.

. . . you think unconditional election is a practice of communist dictatorships.

. . . the only “kirk” you know is from Star Trek.

. . . you think the Three Forms of Unity are health, wealth, and happiness.

. . . you think “catechism” and “dogma” relate to pets.

. . . you think Post Tenebras Lux is a breakfast cereal (it’s actually the motto of post-Reformation Geneva).

From Riddlebolg
Check out some of the other clever word plays in the comment section of the above link.

Top Ten Reasons Why Men Should Not Be Ordained

Saw this a while back and it made me smile....but truth is often spoken in jest...

10. A man's place is in the army.
9. For men who have children, their duties might distract them from the responsibilities of being a parent.
8. Their physical build indicates that men are more suited to tasks such as chopping down trees and wrestling mountain lions. It would be "unnatural" for them to do other forms of work.
7. Man was created before woman. It is therefore obvious that man was a prototype. Thus, they represent an experiment, rather than the crowning achievement of creation.
6. Men are too emotional to be priests or pastors. This is easily demonstrated by their conduct at football games and watching basketball tournaments.
5. Some men are handsome; they will distract women worshipers.
4. To be ordained pastor is to nurture the congregation. But this is not a traditional male role. Rather, throughout history, women have been considered to be not only more skilled than men at nurturing, but also more frequently attracted to it. This makes them the obvious choice for ordination.
3. Men are overly prone to violence. No really manly man wants to settle disputes by any means other than by fighting about it. Thus, they would be poor role models, as well as being dangerously unstable in positions of leadership.
2. Men can still be involved in church activities, even without being ordained. They can sweep paths, repair the church roof, and maybe even lead the singing on Father's Day. By confining themselves to such traditional male roles, they can still be vitally important in the life of the Church.
1. In the New Testament account, the person who betrayed Jesus was a man. Thus, his lack of faith and ensuing punishment stands as a symbol of the subordinated position that all men should take.

The House of God

He was afraid and said,
"How awesome is this place!
This is none other than the house of God;
this is the gate of heaven.”
Genesis 28:17

The facilitator raised an interesting question: “If the Church was a house which room would you find yourself in?”

The question was raised to get us thinking: as answers began to be bantered about I began to project responses for reflecting various types of denominational and non-denominational churches. Certainly not fair but done without malice and as a product of my wandering imagination, which today would be labeled attention-deficit.

Images of grand ballrooms with crystal chandeliers set out for a formal eight course banquet, ornate living-rooms complete with plastic slip covers lest anyone soil the furniture I chuckled audibly remembering both stiff Christians and the homes of my aunts. I let you, dear reader, choose the denomination.

Feigning a cough, my thoughts raced on to other rooms designated for relational encounters, such as living rooms, kitchen nooks and game rooms. Of course, there was the study with book shelves as high as the eye could see with large leather chairs and small reading lamps. Rooms ranged from comfortable and inviting to museum showcases complete with red velvet ropes keeping one at a distance.

I recalled wistfully, homes where everyone entered through the back door and one immediately felt at ease; of kitchens, where within minutes you knew you could raid the refrigerator as if a member of the family…

But where was I ….the facilitator’s efforts woke me from my daydreams, called my meandering back for a moment…where indeed? I found myself on the porch. Oh, and what a lovely porch it was – wide with rockers and rattan chairs, hanging ferns and flowering plants. The porch wrapped around the house, perhaps encircling the entire building. I was standing on the side which was opposite the rock wall that had been erected separating the house from the street many years earlier with its narrow entryway. From this side of the porch I could see a beautiful yard, green grass and large shade trees of every variety. The landscaping seemed endless. I saw former house members playing in the yard; they seemed to be so joyous, free, enjoying the sunshine. There were a few I did not recognize. I wondered if the yard was still part of the house.

Daydreaming, I wondered, “Why was I on the porch?” I was brought back into the discussion again. Why indeed? Two thoughts quickly came to mind: first, I needed to get some fresh air. I found it too stuffy and full of hot air inside. Fortunately, I held my tongue; my comment would not be appreciated.

And then sadly, I remembered, I was on the porch because I no longer felt welcomed in the room I once occupied, inside. I had become invisible, a wallflower, where I once had been included. But the porch was still part of the house, wasn’t it?

I easily slipped back into my reverie. Who said high school had been wasted? Why, on the porch, I can see the neighbors and wave to passersby. Maybe even invite some over to sit and talk. I see several groups on the lawn in conversation, laughing. The feel of the breeze is healing and refreshing. I think I’ll stay on the porch for awhile, put my feet up, and enjoy the fresh air.

I’ll probably go back in sometime, but for now the porch is just fine.

But I am like an olive tree
flourishing in the house of God;
I trust in God's unfailing love
for ever and ever.
Psalm 52:8

Committing an Indecency

And I still haven’t found what I am looking for.
Bono, U2

Author Gerald May writes in her book, The Awakened Heart:
“There is a desire within each of us, in the deep center of ourselves that we call our heart. We were born with it, it is never satisfied, and it never dies. We are often unaware of it, but it is always awake…Our true identity, our reason for being,is to be found in this desire.”

This is what C.S. Lewis called…”almost committing an indecency.” he said.. “I am trying to rip open the inconsolable secret in each one of you – the secret which hurts so much that you take revenge on it by calling it names like Nostalgia and Romanticism and Adolescence."

This may come as a surprise: Christianity is not aninvitation to become a moral person. Christianity is about a relationship with a person. It is about restoring what has been lost and broken. Neither the reformation of society nor the improvement of the individual is the chief aim. Though Christianity has a powerful effect upon the social order and our lives, however when transformation of morality comes, it is always the aftereffect of something else.

At its core, Christianity begins with an invitation to desire which leads to scandalous grace.

Non-negotiables

Recently the question What Are Your "Theological Non-negotiables"? was asked on a message board. Realizing there are many things I think I know but are they non-negotible? Much of what was fixed in stone even ten years ago has become loosened and reconsidered.
Anyway, I came up with my list for now:

• There is a God
• You're not God (and neither am I), and though we're created by God we are somehow not in harmony with God or with each other
• Jesus is God and he demonstrated God's ultimate love for people
• Somehow, through Jesus' birth, life, teaching, death, resurrection, and ascension we can have a right relationship with God and with each other (both now and forever)

"It is not who is right, but what is right, that is of importance."
- Thomas Huxley

Current Readings

"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
— Groucho Marx

Children of the Last Days Series - Michael D. O’Brian
Specifically: Strangers and Sojourners, Plague Journal, and Eclipse of the Sun

The Brothers Karamazov – Fydor Dostoevsky
This is the Hovel Audio recording read brilliantly by Simon Vance. Nineteen plus hours long. I had two 14 hour drives where the brothers became my companions.

The Emotionally Healthy Church – Peter Scazzero